Emotional Intelligence – What is it anyway?
Emotional Intelligence Series – Part II
Continuing this Emotional Intelligence Series, I wanted to get more into “What is Emotional Intelligence.”
Links to Series below:
In Part I, I mentioned this is not a complete definitive article on Emotional Intelligence [ EI ] as that would be overwhelming and not serve the purpose I seek; namely to bring the term Emotional Intelligence [ EI ] and it meaning and it’s application in a more understandable way to the “normal” person interested or having to take court ordered/employer mandated course/class.
To keep things really simple, I like to open with the term Emotional Intelligence as saying “Lets reverse the words to Intelligence With Our Emotions”.
Many of us live in a reactive world to other people, events, situations, our own beliefs and therefore our emotions are highly experienced and expressed without a moment of thought or internal interaction. We simply react to stimuli.
If we observe animals, like our pet dog, we see how it inter-reacts to other dogs while walking it in the park, runners, children, smells, watching TV, etc. Our dog reacts. We often understand it dog’s nature, Dogs bark. Some people try to make their dog “behave” and not bark. They apply Behavior Training so their dog learns more “acceptable” ways of being at the park and at home in the backyard. Some dogs bark at everything others seem better suited to go along smelling, walking and doing their business. Some of this may have to do with the dog’s breed, some the pet owner and their vibes/beliefs, tolerance for the dog’s behavior, perhaps training.
We as human beings have a larger brain and have the ability to perceive more. Both in an IQ (Intelligence Quotient) analytical left brain sort of way and also on an Emotional level (Emotional Intelligence) right brain sort of way.
For example: Some of us are able to “read” people’s expressions, eye movements / eye expression and body positions / language to sense what they are saying….it adds clues to whether we “think” …”Are they are telling the truth?”…whether we are to “believe” that what they are saying is believable and therefore acceptable and true. We accept and discard the conversation and often the person too. So this ability can be also be called “common sense” or “street smarts”.
Most of us have some idea about those two terms called “common sense” or “street smarts”. We laugh and say the 21st Century person has lost that, hence all the online forums asking the most trivial questions, Facebook, the Call In Radio Shows, the Call In TV Shows, Reality TV, older newspaper columns handling such questions. People are very interested in what others think about their situation and what to best do about it. Most people do not look for inner wisdom or guidance from the quiet within.
On the other hand there are people with “Common Sense or Street Smarts” who do pretty well to very well in their lives, many without any or less than the best education. Why is this? They have a “knowing” to how things work and “work it.” This is a component of what is now called the field of Emotional-Social Intelligence. Fancy term for what many of us already know. But what about the others? What about you who think you know what is going on but find yourself reprimanded by the court system, your spouse, your family member, your employer. Are they just plain wrong? Or is there something more to be open to and learn and grow?
Is it possible to grow and learn about this interesting field of emotions?
I firmly believe there is! Emotions are complex and as we start to pay attention to ourselves we start to know who and what we are. Self knowledge often takes a life time of devotion and work. Who really are we as a person, an individual? We do we accept/reject? Why?
Most people accept we are complex beings (called human beings) and that we are made up of three to four components or layers/levels.
- Physical Level
- Mental Level
- Emotional Level
- and overlooked/disputed: Spiritual Level
Most people have a hard time balancing all three or four levels. Since I believe in the Spiritual and most people believe in some kind of Higher Power let’s call it four levels or domains.
The two most overlooked as you can acknowledge are the Emotional and Spiritual domains.
We will look at these four domains next. – Richard
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