Keep the Conflict Small!

Keep the Conflict Small! (With Managed Emotions)

By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

© 2015 by Bill Eddy

Whether you’re having an argument with a family member, friend or co-worker, it’s easy nowadays to make little conflicts way too big. All around us are repeated images of people arguing and losing control of their emotions – in emails, on the Internet, in movies and on TV – especially in the news (do you know what so-and-so said about you-know-who?) Not only is this unnecessary, but allowing conflicts to get large can be harmful to important relationships, increase the anxiety of those around us (especially children) and lower one’s status in other people’s eyes.

For example, in a recent article in Parade Magazine about the steps to becoming a successful entrepreneur, the author-expert Linda Rottenberg wrote: “The most important step is to manage your emotions.” (“An Entrepreneur Should Never Be a Daredevil,” November 2, 2014) In a recently-reported study about children’s brain development, child psychiatrist and researcher Jeffrey Rowe said the first five years of life are critically important to forming proper brain connections. “If you can’t control yourself, can’t control your emotions, you can’t pay attention to the outside world.” (B.J. Fikes, “Money, brain size linked,” U-T San Diego, March 31, 2015)

This article has some suggestions for keeping conflicts small by managing our emotions. Managed emotions are a big part of our skills-training methods, New Ways for Families and New Ways for Work, and may be more important in today’s world than ever before.
Try to Avoid This

A Family Feud: An argument in a couple: “You always leave your socks on the floor.” (That’s a little conflict.) “You’re such a slob.” (Now it’s a judgment about the whole person.) “You men, you’re all alike – irresponsible and self-centered!” (Now it’s about a whole gender.) If another family member came into this argument at this point, he or she would probably take gender sides and the conflict could easily get much bigger.

A Workplace Conflict: Some people clean up after themselves in the lunchroom and others don’t. Joe is a cleaner-upper. ”Look at this banana peel and sandwich bag, just left behind.” (A problem to solve.) “Why do I always have to clean up for everyone else!” (Now it’s about being a victim of everyone.) “Maybe I should go someplace to work where I’m appreciated!” (Now it’s about quitting – ending the relationship.)

A Divorce Dispute: Parents have to discuss a change of schedule: “I’ve got an opportunity for this coming Wednesday night – can we switch so I see the kids Tuesday or Thursday?” (A common problem to solve.) “I’ve told you a hundred times, I’m sticking to our Agreement, with no exceptions. 100%. The kids need absolute stability.” (Now we’re slipping into all-or-nothing thinking. Doubtful that it’s been a hundred times. However, rare cases do require no changes, because of extreme manipulation or violence in the past.) “In fact, I’m going to take you back to court to reduce your time with the kids, you f—ing jerk! You’re the worst father/mother in the world.” (Oops. Guess the children’s stability isn’t the issue after all.)
Try This Instead

In all of the above examples, the speaker quickly went from a simple problem to solve into all-or-nothing thinking and intense emotions. We refer to these emotions as unmanaged emotions, because they don’t get the person what the person really wants: respect, peace and quiet, a happy relationship, or whatever they were looking for. Now they have a bigger problem to solve and probably feel helpless or victimized, and distracted. Remember what the brain researcher said above: You can’t pay attention to the outside world when you’re busy reacting. So how can you manage your emotions in situations like this?

1. Regularly remind yourself to keep the conflict small. Ask yourself:

“Is this really a big deal?”

“Can this problem be solved by making a proposal?”

“What is the smallest issue here? Let’s start by solving that.”

“What are my choices here? I always have choices.”

2. Regularly give yourself encouraging statements. This will help you feel less defensive and less likely to over-react to other people’s behavior or emotions:

“It’s not about me!”

“I’m doing fine! I don’t have to prove anything here.”

“I can take a break!”

“I can handle this. No reason to lose control.”
Emotions Are Contagious

This all might seem very easy to do while you’re reading this. But actually it’s harder to do when other people aren’t managing their emotions, because emotions are contagious. There seems to be at least two reasons for this impact on our brains.

Amygdala responses: We have two amygdalae in our brains; one in the middle of each hemisphere. The right amygdala quickly reacts to other people’s facial expressions of fear and anger, and instantly starts a fight, flight or freeze response. Apparently the left amygdala responds more to threats in writing. You can see the protective response happening when someone else over-reacts – it’s usually sudden and extreme, and sometimes shocking in an office or in a meeting. But our prefrontal cortex (right behind your forehead) can over-ride the amygdala and say: Relax, it’s not a crisis. And the amygdala quiets down. This comes with practice – lots of practice telling yourself what’s not a crisis. This is a lot of what adolescence is about: figuring out what are real dangers that need fast all-or-nothing action and what are just problems to solve rationally.

Mirror neurons: Apparently we have neurons in our brains that fire when we do something AND when we just watch someone else doing something. Is seems that it’s a short-cut to learning – our brains are constantly getting us ready to do what others are doing. It may be a part of our group survival skills that we’re born with. Better to quickly run or fight or hide when others are doing so, rather than risk getting isolated and not surviving. But these responses can also be over-ridden – once you know about this. (So now you know about this.) But it also takes practice.

With this knowledge, you can be more specific with yourself when reminding yourself to keep the conflict small:

“I don’t have to mirror other people’s emotions.”

“I’m just having an amygdala response. But it’s not a crisis, so I can relax.”

“I have a choice: to react or focus on problem-solving. This is just a problem to solve.”
Get Support and Consultation

Another way to keep the conflict small is to talk to other people and get encouragement for yourself. This way you’ll feel less defensive and less anxious. Also, get their consultation suggestions for how to deal with a conflict and help keep it small. Ask: “Do you think this is a crisis? What do you see as my choices? What do you suggest?” Just talking to someone else can make a big difference.

You also may be facing a new problem you’ve never faced before. Don’t feel like you have to deal with it alone and don’t feel ashamed of yourself for being in your situation. Today, the types of problems most of us face have come up for thousands or millions of other people. Family issues, workplace conflicts, divorce disputes are extremely common. Yet it’s easy to see these problems as huge and overwhelming, and become isolated and feel helpless. Remind yourself: “It’s just a problem to solve. I can get consultation and suggestions from someone else. I don’t have to deal with this alone.”

Tune Out Extreme Media

Much of today’s media repeatedly shows dramatic images of people losing control over ordinary problems: from sitcoms to movies to the evening news. They compete to grab your attention with more and more extreme behavior, to get viewers and “market share” in the highly competitive world of modern media. But remember mirror neurons. We are absorbing this extreme loss-of-control behavior we observe, even when we aren’t thinking about it. Use your prefrontal cortex and remind yourself: These aren’t crises; they’re entertainment designed to grab my amygdala and mirror neurons. I can tune this out. It’s up to me what I think and feel.

Conclusion

Modern life has made us more aware of problems around the world, and exposes us constantly to other people’s over-reactions to problems. However, we can keep the conflict small, by what we tell ourselves and by understanding that we have control over our emotions to a great extent – especially if we practice encouraging statements and getting support. We’re not alone with these problems – at home or at work. We can handle them and get help when we need it. We can “Keep the conflict small!”

Bill Eddy is a mediator, lawyer, therapist and the President of the High Conflict Institute based in San Diego. High Conflict Institute provides consultation for high-conflict situations, coaching for BIFF Responses (written responses that are Brief, Informative, Friendly and Firm), and training for professionals in managing high conflict disputes in legal, workplace, healthcare and educational settings. He is also co-author with L. Georgi DiStefano, LCSW, of the Axiom Award-Winning new book: It’s All Your Fault at Work! Managing Narcissists and Other High-Conflict People. For books, videos for anyone, free articles or to schedule a training: www.HighConflictInstitute.com.
________________________________________
CONTACT

Emotional Intelligence

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Director Richard Taylor BS, CAMF
Certified Anger Management Facilitator
Diplomate American Association Anger Management Providers

ANGER ASSESSMENT EVALUATIONS

 

Conflict Management

Atlanta Anger Management
5555 Glenridge Connector
Suite 200 (2nd Floor)
Atlanta, Georgia 30342 USA

Office Phone: 678-576-1913
Fax: 1-866-551-1253
Web: http://www.atlantaangermanagement.com
E-mail: richardtaylor5555@gmail.com

Linked in: http://www.linkedin.com/in/richardtayloraam

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/atlangerman/

#1 Certified Anderson and Anderson™ Anger Management Provider

The Best Of The Best In Anger Management & Emotional Intelligence

Advertisements

Good To Know – ATL Airport Dominates

Clients have flown into Atlanta, GA to work with Richard Taylor of Atlanta Anger Management for issues of emotional control, couples conflict management,  job performance enhancement, and sports anger management.

Cheap flights from Atlanta, GA¹
  • Atlanta, GA is the gateway for cheap flights to domestic and international destinations and it currently has non-stop flights to 235 cities.
  • Atlanta, GA travelers take frequent flights to the following cities of Las Vegas, Nevada, Honolulu, Hawaii and New York City, New York.
  • In 2014 London, United Kingdom was the favorite European destination for travelers flying from Atlanta, GA and was followed by other cities like Rome, Italy, Paris, France and Frankfurt, Germany.
  • San Juan, Puerto Rico and other favorite sunny locations like Montego Bay, Jamaica, St. Thomas are also places visited by Atlanta, GA travelers.
  • The Top Asia destinations like Mumbai (Bombay), India, Manila, Philippines and New Delhi, India are also some favorite places for Atlanta, GA travelers.

Hartsfield-Jackson has a direct economic impact of more than about $32.5 billion for the metro Atlanta area economy.²

Photo Gallery

2015 statistics³

Airports Council International‘s year-to-date figures as of March 2015 are as follows:[1]

Rank Airport Location Country Code
(IATA/ICAO)
Total
passengers
Rank
Change
%
Change
1. United StatesHartsfield–Jackson Atlanta International Airport Atlanta, Georgia United States ATL/KATL 22,746,009 Steady Increase5.1%
2. ChinaBeijing Capital International Airport ChaoyangShunyi, Beijing China PEK/ZBAA 21,663,240 Steady Increase5.5%
3. United Arab EmiratesDubai International Airport Garhoud, Dubai United Arab Emirates DXB/OMDB 19,606,327 Increase3 Increase6.8%
4. JapanTokyo Haneda Airport Ōta, Tokyo Japan HND/RJTT 18,053,930 Steady Increase8.4%
5. United StatesLos Angeles International Airport Los Angeles, California United States LAX/KLAX 16,416,281 Steady Increase2.8%
6. United KingdomLondon Heathrow Airport Hillingdon, London United Kingdom LHR/EGLL 16,364,246 Decrease3 Increase2.0%
7. ChinaHong Kong International Airport Chek Lap Kok, Hong Kong China HKG/VHHH 16,328,000 Increase3 Increase9.0%
8. United StatesO’Hare International Airport Chicago, Illinois United States ORD/KORD 16,258,025 Decrease1 Increase9.8%
9. United StatesDallas/Fort Worth International Airport DallasFort Worth, Texas United States DFW/KDFW 14,487,751 Steady Decrease1.2%
10. ThailandSuvarnabhumi Airport Bang Phli, Samut Prakan Thailand BKK/VTBS 14,139,314 Increase12 Increase14.8%
11. ChinaShanghai Pudong International Airport Pudong, Shanghai China PVG/ZSPD 14,136,814 Increase8 Increase17.7%
12. FranceParis-Charles de Gaulle Airport Roissy-en-France, Île-de-France France CDG/LFPG 14,113,587 Decrease4 Increase2.2%
13. ChinaGuangzhou Baiyun International Airport BaiyunHuadu, Guangzhou, Guangdong China CAN/ZGGG 14,094,902 Increase2 Increase3.7%
14. SingaporeSingapore Changi Airport Changi Singapore SIN/WSSS 13,076,000 Increase2 Decrease0.9%
15. TurkeyIstanbul Atatürk Airport Istanbul Turkey IST/LTBA 12,944,832 Decrease2 Increase4.4%
16. South KoreaSeoul Incheon International Airport Incheon Republic of Korea ICN/RKSI 12,539,595 Increase7 Increase15.6%
17. GermanyFrankfurt Airport Frankfurt, Hesse Germany FRA/EDDF 12,508,282 Decrease6 Increase2.8%
18. IndonesiaSoekarno-Hatta International Airport Cengkareng, Banten Indonesia CGK/WIII 12,314,667 Decrease6 Decrease9.5%
19. United StatesDenver International Airport Denver, Colorado United States DEN/KDEN 12,213,404 Decrease1 Decrease1.4%
20. MalaysiaKuala Lumpur International Airport Sepang, Selangor Malaysia KUL/WMKK 11,972,635 Steady Decrease2.9%
21. United StatesJohn F. Kennedy International Airport Queens, New York City, New York United States JFK/KJFK 11,924,793 Decrease4 Increase7.4%
22. NetherlandsAmsterdam Airport Schiphol Haarlemmermeer, North Holland The Netherlands AMS/EHAM 11,530,950 Decrease8 Increase3.5%
23. United StatesPhoenix Sky Harbor International Airport Phoenix, Arizona United States PHX/KPHX 11,015,495 Increase3 Increase4.5%
24. United StatesMiami International Airport Miami-Dade County, Florida United States MIA/KMIA 10,978,401 Increase5 Increase4.6%
25. United StatesSan Francisco International Airport San Mateo County, California United States SFO/KSFO 10,799,749 Decrease4 Increase5.1%
26. IndiaIndira Gandhi International Airport Delhi India DEL/VIDP 10,686,816 Increase5 Increase13.0%
27. United StatesCharlotte Douglas International Airport Charlotte, North Carolina United States CLT/KCLT 10,344,920 Decrease3 Increase0.1%
28. United StatesMcCarran International Airport Las Vegas, Nevada United States LAS/KLAS 10,307,039 Decrease3 Increase1.7%
29. ChinaChengdu Shuangliu International Airport Shuangliu, Chengdu, Sichuan China CTU/ZUUU 10,184,839 Increase9 Increase13.3%
30. BrazilSão Paulo-Guarulhos International Airport Guarulhos, São Paulo Brazil GRU/SBGR 9,961,379 Steady Increase1.9%

Hotels

ATLANTA’S HARTSFIELD JACKSON INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT

  • Since 1998, Hartsfield-Jackson has been the busiest passenger airport in the world.
  • Atlanta has the tallest air traffic control tower in North America (398 feet or 121 meters) and is the third tallest in the world.
  • Atlanta is within a two hour flight of 80% of the United States population.
  • Hartsfield-Jackson averages almost 250,000 passengers a day.
  • On average, there are over 1,300 daily domestic departures.
  • There are over 150 U.S. destinations with non-stop service from Atlanta.
  • The airport offers direct flights to 95 cities in 57 countries.
  • On average there are over 2,700 arrivals and departures daily, making Hartsfield-Jackson the busiest airport in the world for total movements.
  • Hartsfield-Jackson has 143,000 domestic seats available daily and 132,000 international seats available weekly.
  • The average price of a one-way domestic airline ticket is $172.

Mainline Airlines

Air Canada Continental Airlines Midwest Airlines
Air Canada Jazz Delta Airlines Northwest Airlines
Air France Frontier Airlines Spirit Airlines
AirTran Airways KLM Royal Dutch Airlines United Airlines
American Airlines Korean Air US Airways
Lufthansa German Airlines


Regional Airlines

American Connection / Chautauqua Airlines Delta Connection / SkyWest Airlines
American Connection / American Eagle United Express / Shuttle America
Delta Connection / Atlantic Southeast Airlines US Airways Express / Air Wisconsin
Delta Connection / Comair US Airway Express / Mesa Airlines
Delta Connection / Pinnacle Airlines US Airway Express / PSA
Delta Connection / Shuttle America US Airways Express / Republic Airlines


Charter Airlines

Omni Air Intternational Ryan International World Airways

 

HOME | WHO HAS ANGER | ANGER IS AN EMOTION | WHAT IS ANGER MANAGEMENT |
ANGER MANAGEMENT SCHEDULE
| COURT ORDERED | RAGE MANAGEMENT | COUPLES CONFLICT MANAGEMENT | ANGER ONE DAY COURSE | ANGER ASSESSMENT EVALUATIONS | ANGER EXECTUTIVE COACHING |TEEN ADOLESCENT ANGER MANAGEMENT | STRESS MANAGEMENT |WORKSHOPS | ANGER MANAGEMENT SEMINARS | STRESS SEMINARS | SPEAKER ENGAGEMENTS | ABOUT | BOOKS | LINKS | CONTACT | SITEMAP

Source: http://atlantaangermanagement.com/ATL.htm

____________________________________________________________

¹ http://www.tripadvisor.com/Flights-o60898-From_Atlanta-Cheap_Discount_Airfares.html

² http://www.atlanta-airport.com/Airport/ATL/ATL_FactSheet.aspx

³ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_the_world’s_busiest_airports_by_passenger_traffic#2015_statistics

CONTACT

Director Richard Taylor BS, CAMF
Certified Anger Management Facilitator
Diplomate American Association Anger Management Providers

Atlanta Anger Management
Atlanta, Georgia USA

Office Phone: 678-576-1913
Fax: 1-866-551-1253
Web: www.atlantaangermanagement.com
E-mail: richardtaylor5555@gmail.com

Linked in: http://www.linkedin.com/in/richardtayloraam

#1 Certified Anderson and Anderson™ Anger Management Provider
The Best Of The Best In Anger Management & Emotional Intelligence

9 Ways Therapists Can Tell If Your Relationship Is Going To Survive

9 Ways Therapists Can Tell If Your Relationship
Is Going To Survive

1. You have fun together.

“The skills couples need to keep intimacy alive in a long-term relationship aren’t obvious because people don’t talk about them,” says Tina B. Tessina, PhD, psychotherapist and author of Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting about the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage. “Most couples need to lower their expectations of romance and glamour and raise the level of fun they have together,” she says. This means having regular dates and check-in talks, plus taking time to enjoy activities together. “Successful couples make plans to try new things together, go out, have fun, laugh, and play,” adds Marni Feuerman, a marriage expert in Boca Raton, Florida. “They know that novelty breathes positive energy into a relationship.”

2. You’re trustworthy.

Hiding purchases, online relationships, or your feelings from your spouse? That’s a big no-no. “Couples in successful marriages have each other’s backs and do not keep secrets,” says Feuerman. “They behave in ways that better both each other and the relationship—not just themselves.”

3. You’re in it together.

“The most powerful thing you can do to keep a marriage strong is form a partnership in which both parties feel respected, cared about, and needed,” says Tessina. Even if you’re having problems, if you approach them as a team they’re easier to solve. Michael J. Salamon, PhD, a couples therapist based in Hewlett, New York and author of Every Pot Has a Cover: A Proven System for Finding, Keeping and Enhancing the Ideal Relationship, points to a couple he recently worked with as a great example of teamwork. “Financial stress caused them to cut their budget way back, and the stress was exacerbated every month when bills arrived,” he explains. The couple fought a lot about what to pay and when. So Salamon asked them to develop a plan to manage their bills while he observed them. “Just giving them the task of working on it together changed the tone. They saw the challenge now as something that belonged to both of them and, and something they should work on together,” he says.

4. You touch each other.

Often. Couples who love each other show it, even during the difficult times that land them in therapy. If you want your marriage to make it, touch your partner as often as possible (put your hand on your spouse’s leg while driving; give him a little squeeze now and then; hug and kiss each other.) Make a point to cuddle in front of the television, on the porch swing, or in your bedroom. “Intimacy is the art of making your partner feel understood and accepted,” says Tessina. “When this feeling is created, barriers fall.” And that brings us to sex. “If a marriage is going to last, both partners need to be able to demonstrate their love by giving and receiving physical affection,” says Feuerman. “A romantic relationship is a sexual relationship and not just a platonic friendship.”

5. You let go of grudges.

Simply put, resentment will destroy a marriage. So you need to step up and say “I’m upset because X.” “When one spouse claims to be ‘fine’ when he is in fact agitated, it creates an environment in which one person has to guess the other’s true feelings, and no one likes that game,” says Karissa Brennan, a New York City-based psychotherapist and founder of Cloud Counseling, an online counseling site. “The more you show your partner what bothers you, the more she’ll understand how to help you through it,” she says. Marriages are successful when couples learn to express their feelings clearly and respectfully in the moment.

6. You lean in.

Not in a Sheryl Sandberg kind of way, but in a body language kind of way. “A tilt of the head, a shift of the leg, a look or a change in tone can all indicate a breakthrough, a change in awareness that says they are now hearing, understanding and are being responsive to one another,” says Salamon. He cites a couple he recently worked with where the wife felt like her husband didn’t show affection anymore. After a bit of back and forth it became clear that mornings for the couple were especially hectic. “I asked if they kiss one another good-bye when they leave every morning and hello when they get home every night,” he says. “They committed right then and there to kiss more, even if just in passing, and to have one date night a week.”

7. You like and respect each other.

Spouses in successful marriages really strive to meet each other’s needs simply because they genuinely like to see their partners happy. “They’re concerned when their spouse seems unhappy and don’t just blow it off, thinking ‘that’s his problem,’ ” says Feuerman. They ask what’s wrong when something seems off. They offer solutions. And they show gratitude and appreciation for each other by thanking them and hearing them out.

8. You empathize with each other.

“I notice if couples are empathizing with each other, listening attentively, and responding,” says Feuerman. “Good partners turn toward each other—not away—when one of them is trying to make an emotional connection.” Likewise, successful couples try hard to avoid gridlock on issues. “Some issues in a relationship are just not solvable (for example, personality traits) so a couple that is going to make it practices things like tolerance, empathy, and negotiation when problems arise,” says Feuerman.

9. You make up the right way.

The biggest clue to whether a marriage is sustainable is how couples reunite after a tiff, says Jeannette Raymond, PhD, a licensed marriage therapist in Los Angeles and author of Now You Want Me, Now You Don’t!. “Taking the initiative to invite your partner back into your world after a disappointment is a good sign,” she says. “It doesn’t mean you have necessarily gotten over it, but it shows that your need to restore your emotional connection and security in the relationship takes precedence over your hurt feelings.” These couples want to make it work and recognize that sometimes that means saying you’re sorry and sticking around to solve the problems. Adds Feuerman: “One of the most important things I notice is that the couple views their marriage as a life-long journey and not something to quickly bail on when things get rough. The couples that make it ride out the ups and downs together as a team and stay committed.”

Source: http://www.msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/love-sex/9-ways-therapists-can-tell-if-your-relationship-is-going-to-survive/ss-AAcm2x1?ocid=UP97DHP&fullscreen=true#image=2

LOCAL ATLANTA COUPLES CONFLICT HELP:

CONTACT:

Richard TaylorDirector Richard Taylor BS, CAMF
Certified Anger Management Facilitator
Diplomate American Association Anger Management Providers

Atlanta Anger Management
5555 Glenridge Connector
Suite 200 (2nd Floor)
Atlanta, Georgia 30342 USA

Office Phone: 678-576-1913
Fax: 1-866-551-1253
Web: www.atlantaangermanagement.com
E-mail: richardtaylor5555@gmail.com

Linked in:http://www.linkedin.com/in/richardtayloraam

#1 Certified Anderson and Anderson™ Anger Management Provider
The Best Of The Best In Anger Management & Emotional Intelligence

Vegetable Oils Are Toxic – STOP

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

6 Reasons Why Vegetable Oils Are Toxic
By Kris Gunnars

“I am personally convinced that vegetable oils (along with added sugars and refined wheat) are key players in the epidemics of chronic, Western diseases, which are currently the biggest health problems in the world.
Take Home Message
If you want to be healthy, feel good and lower your risk of serious diseases, then you should avoid vegetable oils as if your life depended on it (it does).

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FAST TIP:
Good Oils: Organic Extra Virgin Olive Oil not heated, Avocado Oil for cooking high heat, and Organic Extra Virgin Coconut Oil for smoothies, cooking. Use all sparingly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Many people perceive vegetable oils as healthy.
Maybe it’s because they have the word “vegetable” in them.
I mean… vegetables are good for you, right? So vegetable oil must be too…

Even the mainstream nutrition organizations recommend that we eat them, because according to them, unsaturated fats are much healthier than saturated fats.

However, many studies have now demonstrated that these oils can cause serious harm (1).
The composition of the fatty acids in them is different than anything we were ever exposed to throughout evolution.

This is leading to physiological changes within our bodies and contributing to multiple diseases.

hhjak of pixabay  Used With permission.

hhjak of pixabay
Used With Permission.

6 reasons why vegetable oils are downright toxic.

1. Vegetable Oils are Very “Unnatural” in Large Amounts
In this article, I’m referring to processed seed oils like soybean oil, sunflower oil, corn oil, canola oil, cottonseed oil, safflower oil and a few others.
Even though they aren’t really vegetables, these oils are commonly referred to as “vegetable oils.”
These oils contain very large amounts of biologically active fats called Omega-6 polyunsaturated fatty acids, which are harmful in excess.
This does NOT apply to healthy plant oils like olive oil or coconut oil, which are extremely good for you.
Humans have been evolving for a very long time, but industrial food processing is brand new. We didn’t start producing vegetable oils until about a hundred years ago.
Between the years 1909 and 1999, the consumption of soybean oil increased more than a thousandfold and now supplies about 7% of calories in the U.S. diet (2).

Take a look at this video to see how commercial canola oil is made:
This processing method is really disgusting and involves pressing, heating, various industrial chemicals and highly toxic solvents. Other vegetable oils are processed in a similar manner.

It baffles me that anyone would think this stuff is fit for human consumption.
If you choose healthier brands that have been cold pressed (lower yield and therefore more expensive) then the processing method will be much less disgusting, but there is still the problem of excess Omega-6 fats.

Bottom Line: Humans were never exposed to these oils until very recently on an evolutionary scale, because we didn’t have the technology to process them.

2. Vegetable Oils Mess up The Fatty Acid Composition of The Body’s Cells
There are two types of fatty acids that are termed “essential” – because the body can’t produce them.

These are the Omega-3 and Omega-6 fatty acids.

It is absolutely essential for the human body to get these fatty acids from the diet, but it must get them in a certain balance.
While humans were evolving, our Omega-6:Omega-3 ratio may have been around 4:1 to 1:2. Today, our ratio is as high as 16:1 on average, with great variation between individuals (3).

These fatty acids aren’t just inert structural molecules or fuel for the cell’s mitochondria, they serve vital functions related to processes known to affect various systems like the immune system (4).

When the balance of Omega-6s and Omega-3s in the cell is off, things can start to go terribly wrong.

Another problem is the relative unsaturation of these fatty acids. Polyunsaturated fats have two or more double bounds, while monounsaturated fats have one and saturated fats have no double bonds.

The more double bonds in a fatty acid, the more reactive it is. Polyunsaturated fatstend to react with oxygen, which can cause chain reactions, damaging other structures and perhaps even vital structures like DNA (5, 6).

These fatty acids tend to sit in the cell membranes, increasing harmful oxidative chain reactions.

Our body fat stores of Linoleic Acid (the most common Omega-6 fat) have increased 3-fold in the past 50 years.
That’s right, excessive consumption of vegetable oils leads to actual structural changes within our fat stores and our cell membranes.
I don’t know about you, but I find that to be a pretty scary thought.

Bottom Line: Omega-6 and Omega-3 fatty acids are biologically active and humans need to eat them in a certain balance to function optimally. Excess Omega-6s in our cell membranes are prone to harmful chain reactions.

 

3. Vegetable Oils Contribute to Inflammation
Omega-3 and Omega-6 fatty acids are used to make substances called eicosanoids in the body.

These are modified fatty acids that sit in the cell membranes.

There, they play a crucial role in bodily functions like cellular messaging, immunity and inflammation.

If you’ve ever taken aspirin or ibuprofen and noticed relief from headache or some kind of pain, then that’s because these drugs inhibit the eicosanoid pathways and reduce inflammation.

Whereas acute inflammation is good and helps your body heal from damage (such as when you step on a lego), having chronic, systemic inflammation all over your body is very bad.
Generally speaking, eicosanoids made from Omega-6s are pro-inflammatory, while those made from Omega-3s are anti-inflammatory (7).

These different fatty acids compete with each other. The more Omega-6 you have, the more Omega-3 you need. The less Omega-6 you have, the less Omega-3 you need (8).
Having high Omega-6 AND low Omega-3 is a recipe for disaster, but this is the case for people eating a Western diet.

Put simply, a diet that is high in Omega-6 but low in Omega-3 contributes to inflammation. A diet that has balanced amounts of both Omega-6 and Omega-3 reduces inflammation (9).

It is now believed that increased inflammation can contribute to various serious diseases, including cardiovascular disease, arthritis, depression and even cancer.

Bottom Line: Eicosanoids, signaling molecules made from Omega-6 and Omega-3 fats, are crucial in regulating inflammation in the body. The more Omega-6s you eat, the more systemic inflammation you will have.

4. Vegetable Oils Are Loaded With Trans Fats
Trans fats are unsaturated fats that are modified to be solid at room temperature.

These fats are highly toxic and are associated with an increased risk of various diseases, like heart disease, cancer, diabetes and obesity (10, 11, 12).

They are so bad that even the governments around the world have started taking action, setting laws that command food manufacturers to reduce the trans fat content of their foods.

However, a little known fact is that vegetable oils often contain massive amounts of trans fats.

In one study that looked at soybean and canola oils found on store shelves in the U.S., about 0.56% to 4.2% of the fatty acids in them were toxic trans fats (13).

If you want to reduce your exposure to trans fats (you should) then it’s not enough to avoid common trans fat sources like cookies and processed baked goods, you also need to avoid vegetable oils.

Bottom Line: Trans fats are highly toxic and associated with multiple diseases. Soybean and canola oils commonly sold in the U.S. contain very large amounts of trans fats.

5. Vegetable Oils Can Dramatically Raise Your Risk of Cardiovascular Disease
Cardiovascular disease is the most common cause of death in the world (14).

Whereas saturated fats were once considered to be key players, newer studies prove that they areharmless (15, 16).

Now the attention is increasingly being turned to vegetable oils.

Multiple randomized controlled trials have examined the effects that vegetable oils can have on cardiovascular disease.

3 studies have found a drastically increased risk (17, 18, 19), while 4 found no statistically significant effect (20, 21, 22, 23).

Only one study found a protective effect, but this study had a number of flaws (24).

If you look at observational studies, you find a very strong correlation.
This graph is from one study where the Omega-6 content of blood was plotted against the risk of death from cardiovascular disease (25):

 

You can see the U.S. sitting there at the top right, with the most Omega-6 AND the greatest risk of death from cardiovascular disease.

Even though this study only shows a correlation, it makes perfect sense given that inflammation is a known contributor to these diseases.

I’d like to point out that there are some studies showing that polyunsaturated fats reduce the risk of cardiovascular disease. But the problem is that they don’t make the distinction between Omega-3s and Omega-6s, which is absolutely crucial.

When they do, they see that Omega-6s actually increase the risk, while Omega-3s have a protective effect (26).

Bottom Line: There is evidence from both randomized controlled trials and observational studies that vegetable oils can increase the risk of cardiovascular disease.

6. Vegetable Oil Consumption is Associated With Various Other Diseases
Because polyunsaturated fats are so tightly involved in the function of the body on a molecular level, it makes sense that they could affect other diseases as well.

Many of these association aren’t well studied in humans (yet), but there are both observational studies and animal studies linking vegetable oils to other serious diseases:

• In one study, increased Omega-6 in breast milk was associated with asthma and eczema in young children (27).

• Studies in both animals and humans have linked increased Omega-6 intake to cancer (28, 29).

• One study shows a very strong correlation between vegetable oil consumption and homicide rates (30).

• The Omega-6:Omega-3 ratio in blood has been found to be strongly associated with the risk of severe depression (31).

This is just the tip of the iceberg. Inflammation, and therefore vegetable oil consumption, is associated with a wide range of serious diseases and it is beyond the scope of this article to cover all of them.

I am personally convinced that vegetable oils (along with added sugars and refined wheat) are key players in the epidemics of chronic, Western diseases, which are currently the biggest health problems in the world.

Take Home Message
If you want to be healthy, feel good and lower your risk of serious diseases, then you should avoid vegetable oils as if your life depended on it (it does).

© 2012-2015 Authority Nutrition. All rights reserved.
AuthorityNutrition.com does not provide medical advice, treatment or diagnosis.

SOURCE: http://authoritynutrition.com/6-reasons-why-vegetable-oils-are-toxic/

DISCLAIMER: Richard Taylor does not provide medical advice, treatment or diagnosis.
Consult your Holistic Integrated Medicine Practitioner for health concerns.
ATLANTA ANGER MANAGEMENT : Public Service Announcement.