Do You Have Joy In Your Life?
This question came up in last Saturday’s Anger Management all day class
with one participate answering no. Sadly life had beat him down.
The question became:
” How do I start to get
joyful living back?
Start with Positives. Look for positives in each moment and stay ever present (Mindfulness) changing your negative self talk (scripts).
How? By increasing your Focus Of Intention. Become more self aware of what you are thinking. This is called The Self Observing The Self. When I become aware I am thinking or saying something negative (not nice)…STOP! Reach for the “clicker” called awareness and change the Focus of your thought/talk to something constructive or pleasurable.
Often when we are in an unhappy place in our lives we are ‘stuck” Just frozen in the feeling. We cease to find living an experience of joyfulness. The wonder of children perspective on discovery, learning, just being.
We Need To Get Unstuck.
We Need T0 Change It Up!
All of us at times need to make a decision to change up our life. often this might mean to take a risk. Perhaps move, decide to seek out joy. Google the concepts and become a learner, grow, choose to live again.
Become Positive By Being Positive.
It is hard to drag yourself out of the quicksand of your life! You can do it!
Become creative. Watch positive movies, TV, read positive magazines, Internet articles and blogs and Books! Saturate yourself with new scripts of joy, happiness and positivity!
HECTOR AND THE SEARCH FOR HAPPINESS
I just join the I AM HAPPY PROJECT and found this below!
Have you ever looked your To-DO List to see that you have much more on your plate than you realized?
Sometimes added responsibilities in your life equal increased opportunities to procrastinate so, its important to remind yourself how to stay motivated and get things done.
Motivation is defined as “the desire to achieve a goal, combined with the energy to work towards it”. If you Google the topic of “Motivation” you will find that most tips on motivation have to do with big goals like losing weight or finding a job. But, sometimes we need motivational strategies for accomplishing the little things in life like doing the laundry or paying your bills.
Below are some motivational strategies that I think will help you get the little things, as well as the big things in your life done.
- Talk to yourself. We have 50,000 to 70,000 thought a day. Unfortunately, it’s usually to give ourselves negative messages. The next time you are feeling stuck, try talking yourself through the process and giving yourself positive feedback. Talking yourself through the process will help to keep you focused on exactly what you are doing and what comes next and giving yourself positive feedback will motivate you to continue.
- Connect with the “desire”. Why is it important to get this done? Even if you have a goal that is seemingly undesirable, like doing laundry or paying bills, it’s a lot more motivating to focus on the outcome instead of the act. The goal of paying your bills on time may be to establish and maintain a good credit score. Doing your laundry and having clean clothes will help you look and feel better about yourself, thus getting you that new position at work or meeting mister or miss “right”.
- Remember you have a choice. Don’t let the need to rebel stop you. It’s important to remember that you do have a choice. Often we are not motivated to do things we think we “have” to do. True, there are things we “should” do in order to avoid unpleasant consequences, but the choice is still ours. So, instead of saying, “I have to finish that report tonight” why not motivate yourself by saying, “I choose to finish the report tonight because I value a sense of completion”.
- Develop a sense of curiosity. Get curious about something. Formulate a question about what you are doing and work to find answers. Let a sense of wonder motivate you – “I wonder what would happen if I was early for work every day, how much work I could get done?” Challenge yourself to find an answer.
- Make your goal hard to ignore. Set up reminders so that they are constantly in front of you. For example, if your goal is to do one load of laundry every day, make sure you put the basket of dirty laundry in the middle of the doorway so that you bump into it every time you walk out of the room. Posting visual cues and setting alarms are essential to staying focused and motivated.
- Use a body double. A body double is simply someone who sits in the same room with you as you work. Sometimes you just need the presence of another person to motivate you to work on an undesirable task. Consider having a friend come over to keep you company while you pay your bills or sort through clutter.
- Break it down. I have been procrastinating on cleaning out my computer files for months so I decided to break the task into doable pieces. Every day I delete or file at least 10 documents. The strange thing is – by giving myself permission to only do 10, sometimes I feel motivated to do more!
- Reward yourself. Make it worth your while to complete a task. When you have something to look forward to after the job is done, it will make it a lot more doable. After I finish writing this – I’m going out to rent a movie!
- Visualize. Before you start working on your goal, try closing your eyes and visualizing yourself doing and completing each step. For example, “I have already visualized how relieved and satisfied I will be when I get this task done”.
- Change environments. Sometimes what it takes to get motivated and inspired is to change your environment. If you are inside – take your work outdoors or move to another room. Going to the library or a coffee shop can really make a difference. I’ve been known to go and work in my car in order to finish a project. Sometimes moving to another state might be needed, or a travel trip!
- Make it fun! Find ways to make your fun. Play music you enjoy or watch a funny show while you work. Do unpleasant tasks with friends who can keep you company and cheer you on. Dancing and singing while you do housework should also make for a fun time or at the very least- a good laugh!
To have fun, be fun!
One last thing….Reminder:
Fake It Until You Become It.
Find Your Joy Coaching:
Director Richard Taylor BS, CAMF
Certified Anger Management Facilitator
Diplomate American Association Anger Management Providers
Atlanta Anger Management
5555 Glenridge Connector
Suite 200 (2nd Floor)
Atlanta, Georgia 30342 USA
Linked in: http://www.linkedin.com/in/richardtayloraam
#1 Certified Anderson and Anderson™ Anger Management Provider
The Best Of The Best In Anger Management & Emotional Intelligence