Road Rage – When Driving List

Road Rage – When Driving List

ROAD RAGE IS…

Road Rage is often called intermittent explosive disorder, a term used to refer to violent incidents resulting from stress caused by accidents or incidents on roadways. It is often a natural extension of aggressive driving.

Road Rage frustration and aggression are often triggered by traffic conditions, being in a hurry, stress related to other pressures. Road Rage is a feeling of retaliating of awlfulizing the other driver. The other driver deserves retribution. We make a free choice in what we do. We choose how we are going to respond.

∇ Are you experiencing aggressive driving in your attitude when behind the wheel?

∇ Find yourself driving erratically?

∇ Getting ‘worked up” driving?

∇ Find yourself saying not nice things called Expletives?

∇ Driving definitely causing you a lot of stress?

Used With Permission Pixabay.com johnhain

 

 

Road Rage:

  • Occurs when a driver reacts angrily to other drivers
  • You cut off another driver
  • Tailgating
  • Gesturing or waving fist.
  • Flip off someone
  • Aggressive driving
  • Excessive speeds
  • Scream at another
  • Chase another car
  • Honk continuously at another car
  • Make threatening gestures
  • Try to injure or kill another driver
  • Name what you do: _______________

Road Rage is an symptom of an underlying issue with a driver. Impulse Control is a major issue. They are unable to remain in control of themselves or their emotions. Often stress is very high in your life. Perhaps your personal or business life is not going very well. Your anger spreads beyond driving creeping into other aspects of your life.

Choose to Calm Down and disengage from your stress.

 

For drivers who do not experience Road Rage knowing what might trigger a person is equally important.

 

Do not “flip off” someone with your middle finger. They may have a pistol in hand waiting for an excuse. Some people may just not like your look. Your race. Your hair color.

 

Atlanta has now become an aggressive driving city with too many cars and not enough roads.

 

Vote for more MARTA, High Speed Trains, Other Public Transportation ideas when they come up in Voting. Use MARTA when you can.

 

WHEN DRIVING:

  • Be calm
  • Listen to soothing music
  • Slow down
  • Take more time to get to your destination and expect delays
  • Plan your driving trip before you drive so you know where you are going. Use Google maps.
  • Plan to arrive 20 minutes early so if traffic bad you are not stressed
  • Become a better driver
  • If you have anxiety while driving take a driver education course in defensive driving
  • Be courteous while driving
  • Make appointments in non traffic times
  • Stop multi-tasking while driving
  • Stop talking on phone while driving
  • Stop looking at your phone while driving
  • Practice holding the steering wheel with two hands so your other hand does not auto multi-task
  • Allow a car beside you to get ahead of you when lane narrows
  • When a driver cuts in front of you abruptly, let it go and expect that again
  • Drive with 360 degree awareness paying attention to all sides, front, back, left, right (Zen Driving)
  • Anticipate traffic incidents with attentive awareness “reading” the traffic ahead of you
  • Practice Positive Self Talk and say things like “Calm Down” “I feel Calm” “No big deal”
  • Do not use expletives like idiot, stupid, asshole, *uck you, *ucker, Mother*ucker
  • Do not use expletives like _____________ _______________ _____________
  • Arrive safely to live another day

 

Remain Calm and Carry On. Repeat this to yourself.

Road Rage Help

See: What is Anger.

See: Do I Need Anger Management?

See: Rage Management

See: Road Rage Management

CONTACT:

Director Richard Taylor BS, CAMF
Certified Anger Management Facilitator
Diplomate American Association Anger Management Providers

Richard TaylorAtlanta Anger Management
5555 Glenridge Connector
Suite 200 (2nd Floor)
Atlanta, Georgia 30342 USA

Office Phone: 678-576-1913
Fax: 1-866-551-1253
Web: www.atlantaangermanagement.com
E-mail: richardtaylor5555@gmail.com

Linked in:http://www.linkedin.com/in/richardtayloraam

#1 Certified Anderson and Anderson™ Anger Management Provider
The Best Of The Best In Anger Management & Emotional Intelligence

 

BUILDING OPTIMISM

Learning to be Optimistic

REWIRE THE BRAIN WITH FOCUSED THOUGHT

ABCDE MODEL 

Learn to be optimistic using a technique based on Albert Ellis – Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy.

Professor Martin Seligman has elaborated on this in his book ‘Authentic Happiness’

This is a method for building optimism by recognizing and disputing pessimistic thoughts. The key to disputing your own pessimistic thoughts is to first recognize them and then to treat them as if they were uttered by an external person, a rival whose mission in life is to make you miserable.

  1. Become more aware of your conscious thought processes and begin to treat them as if they were being uttered by an external person whose goal in life is to make you unhappy.  (Distancing)
  2. Distract yourself from the thoughts – i.e. don’t allow yourself to think about them by directing your mind elsewhere. The rubber band technique is useful. Distraction is the best technique if you have to perform a task and it would be unhelpful to think about it.
  3. Dispute the beliefs. Disputation is the most important technique here and involves checking out the accuracy of the beliefs about ourselves that are encouraging us to feel pessimistic.  When we dispute we use the same techniques which we use to argue with other people.

Once you recognize that you have a pessimistic thought that seems unwarranted, counteract it by using the ABCDE model.

A stands for Activating Event
B for the Beliefs you automatically have when it occurs
C for Consequences of the belief
D for your Disputing your routine belief – using facts and logic, not wasteful thinking on affirmations.
E for the Energization that occurs when you dispute it successfully (this simply means to pay attention to how you feel (e.g. lighter, more energized, more optimistic) as a result of disputing your negative thoughts)

By effectively disputing the beliefs that follow an activating event or adversity, you can change your reaction from dejection and giving up to activity and embrace good cheer.

Exercise – During the next 5 activating events or adversity you face in your daily life, listen closely for your beliefs, observe the consequences, and dispute your beliefs vigorously. Record all this on a piece of paper.  Once you have done this on paper a few times you can then simply go through the process in your head.

Example:

Adversity:      

You gave a presentation and didn’t use your allocated time and stumbled in a few places.

Belief:    

I’m really bad at public speaking.  I always make a mess of it.  I really ought not to do it again because I’ll just be as bad.  My boss must think I’m not up to the job.

Consequences: 

You turn down appointments to speak and therefore let your fear get the better of
you.  If you speak again you are very nervous and apprehensive and therefore much more likely to make mistakes.

Disputation:    

I haven’t had much experience of giving presentations.  That was only my third.
The head of department spoke for less time as well and no-one was bothering about it.  A number  of people asked me questions and were interested in what I was saying.  Kevin even said he liked my slides and he isn’t one to say positive things to people.  I might not have been that fluent but I was ok and if I can conquer my nerves I should be better next time.

There are 4 different ways to make your disputations convincing:

Evidence – shows that the negative beliefs are factually incorrect. Most negative beliefs are overreactions. So ask ‘what is the evidence for this belief?’  (This is not just about affirmations or repeating positive statements it is about employing logical arguments.)

Alternatives ask yourself if there are alternative ways to look at the problem which are less damaging to yourself. Focus in particular on causes which are changeable (e.i. you were tired), the specific (e.i. only this instance), and the non personal (other people’s contribution to the problem).

Implications – even if you still take a negative view of what you have done you can still decatastrophize. E.I. even if you did put your foot in it at the interview and didn’t get this job what are the implications for other jobs or the rest of your life? [You are not defined by failure, success is on the horizon.]

Usefulness – question the usefulness of your belief. It can be helpful here to realize that even negative situations can in the long run work out well. We can also realize that some of our beliefs about the world (e.i. that it should be fair) though laudable lead us to be unduly negative. [Think: “Everything turns out as it out to be for the better good.”]

 

Source: http://www.centreforconfidence.co.uk/pp/techniques.php?p=c2lkPTQmdGlkPTMmaWQ9NjY=

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Director Richard Taylor BS, CAMF
Certified Anger Management Facilitator
Diplomate American Association Anger Management Providers

Atlanta Anger Management 
5555 Glenridge Connector
Suite 200 (2nd Floor)
Atlanta, Georgia 30342 USA

Phone: 678-576-1913
Fax: 1-866-551-1253
Web: www.atlantaangermanagement.com
E-mail: richardtaylor5555@gmail.com

Linked in:http://www.linkedin.com/in/richardtayloraam

A Certified Anderson and Anderson™ Anger Management Provider
The Best Of The Best In Anger Management & Emotional Intelligence

FOCUS – A KEY TO SELF CONTROL

FOCUS – Is one of the keys to self control and improved Social Intelligence.

Richard Taylor of Atlanta Anger Management uses the Anderson and Anderson Contrasting Wheels of Behavior to help clients move quickly into more positive constructive relationship patterns.

Today we look at FOCUS or Paying Attention with Awareness.

Is your mind wandering?

The Practice

Pay attention.

Why?

Moment to moment, the flows of thoughts and feelings, sensations and desires, and conscious and unconscious processes sculpt your nervous system like water gradually carving furrows and eventually gullies on a hillside. Your brain is continually changing its structure. The only question is: Is it for better or worse?

In particular, because of what’s called “experience-dependent neuroplasticity,” whatever you hold in attention has a special power to change your brain. Attention is like a combination spotlight and vacuum cleaner: it illuminates what it rests upon and then sucks it into your brain – and your self.

Therefore, controlling your attention – becoming more able to place it where you want it and keep it there, and more able to pull it away from what’s bothersome or pointless (such as looping again and again through anxious preoccupations, mental grumbling, or self-criticism) – is the foundation of changing your brain, and thus your life, for the better.

As the great psychologist, William James, wrote over a century ago: “The education of attention would be the education par excellence.”

But to gain better control of attention – to become more mindful and more able to concentrate – we need to overcome a few challenges. In order to survive, our ancestors evolved to be stimulation-hungry and easily distracted, continually scanning their interior and their environment for opportunities and threats, carrots and sticks. There is also a natural range of temperament, from focused and cautious “turtles” to distractible and adventuresome “jackrabbits.” Upsetting experiences – especially traumatic ones – train the brain to be vigilant, with attention skittering from one thing to another. And modern culture makes us accustomed to an intense incoming fire hose of stimuli, so anything less – like the sensations of simply breathing – can feel unrewarding, boring, or frustrating.

To overcome these challenges, it’s useful to cultivate some neural factors of attention – in effect, getting your brain on your side to help you get a better grip on this spotlight/vacuum cleaner.

How?

You can use one or more of the seven factors below at the start of any deliberate focusing of attention – from keeping your head in a dull business meeting to contemplative practices such as meditation or prayer – and then let them move to the background as you shift into whatever the activity is.

You can also draw upon one or more during the activity if your attention is flagging. They are listed in an order that makes sense to me, but you can vary the sequence. (There’s more information about attention, mindfulness, concentration, and contemplative absorption inBuddha’s Brain.)

7 Things To Help Keep Focus:

1.  Set the intention to sustain your attention, to be mindful. You can do this both top-down, by giving yourself a gentle instruction to be attentive, and bottom-up, by opening to the sense in your body of what mindfulness feels like.

2.  Relax. Use Conscious Breathing. For example, take several exhalations that are twice as long as your inhalations. This stimulates the calming, centering parasympathetic nervous system and settles down the fight-or-flight stress-response sympathetic nervous system that jiggles the spotlight of attention this way and that, looking for carrots and sticks.

3.  Without straining at it, think of things that help you feel cared about – that you matter to someone, that you belong in a relationship or group, that you are seen and appreciated, or even cherished and loved. It’s OK if the relationship isn’t perfect, or that you bring to mind people from the past, or pets, or spiritual beings. You could also get a sense of your own goodwill for others, your own compassion, kindness, and love. Warming up the heart in this way helps you feel protected, and it brings a rewarding juiciness to the moment – which support #4 and #5 below.

4.  Think of things that help you feel safer, and thus more able to rest attention on your activities, rather than vigilantly scanning. Notice that you are likely in a relatively safe setting, with resources inside you to cope with whatever life brings. Let go of any unreasonable anxiety, any unnecessary guarding or bracing.

5.  Gently encourage some positive feelings, even mild or subtle ones. For example, think of something you feel glad about or grateful for; go-to’s for me include my kids, Yosemite, and just being alive. Open as you can to an underlying sense of well-being that may nonetheless contain some struggles or pain. The sense of pleasure or reward in positive emotions increases the neurotransmitter, dopamine, which closes a kind of gate in the neural substrates of working memory, thus keeping out any “barbarians,” any invasive distractions.

6.  Get a sense of the body as a whole, its many sensations appearing together each moment in the boundless space of awareness. This sense of things as a unified gestalt, perceived within a large and panoramic perspective, activates networks on the sides of the brain (especially the right – for right-handed people) that support sustained mindfulness. And it de-activates the networks along the midline of the brain that we use when we’re lost in thought.

7.  For 10-20-30 seconds in a row, stay with whatever positive experiences you’re having or lessons you’re learning. Since “neurons that fire together, wire together,” this savoring and registering helps weave the fruits of your attentive efforts into the fabric of your brain and your self. [You change.]

by

Rick Hanson, Ph.D.
25 Mitchell Blvd.
San Rafael, California 94903

Used With Permission

My latest book is adapted from this newsletter and is titled Just One Thing: Developing a Buddha Brain One Simple Practice at a Time. In the book, I present 52 of my favorite practices – simple actions inside your mind – to light up the neural networks of deep well-being and resilience.

Just One Thing: Developing A Buddha Brain One Simple Practice at a Time

by Rick Hanson by New Harbinger Publications
Paperback

List Price: $15.95
Our Price: $9.62

Buy Now

RICHARD TAYLOR’S FAVORITE BOOKS, DVDS ON: REWIRE YOUR BRAIN, MEDITATION, MINDFULNESS, PATHS TO SELF IMPROVEMENT, BRAIN SCIENCE, BRAIN NEUROPLASICITY

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE & ANGER MANAGEMENT go hand in hand.
First Step: Self Awareness
Second Step: Self Control
Third Step: Social Intelligence & Awareness
Fourth Step: Relationship Management

FOCUS – Using Mindful Attention To What We Are Doing is key to rewire the brain
to become more (slower) responsive then caveman fight, flight, freeze instant reactivity.

My Suggestion:

1. Stop Multi-Tasking when you can.

2. Turn off TV and Radio when you can. Embrace silence.

3. Silence allows us to hear our inner brain (ego) chatter.

4. Catch Negative thoughts. Change them to Positive thoughts. Click -> Change the channel! Called: 3 C’s -> Catch It. Check It. Change It.

5. Linger 10-20-30 seconds on these positive thoughts or experiences to rewire the brain.

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Director Richard Taylor BS, CAMF
Certified Anger Management Facilitator
Diplomate American Association Anger Management Providers

Atlanta Anger Management 
5555 Glenridge Connector
Suite 200 (2nd Floor)
Atlanta, Georgia 30342 USA

Office Phone: 678-576-1913
Fax: 1-866-551-1253
Web: www.atlantaangermanagement.com
E-mail: richardtaylor5555@gmail.com

Linked in:http://www.linkedin.com/in/richardtayloraam

A Certified Anderson and Anderson™ Anger Management Provider
The Best Of The Best In Anger Management & Emotional Intelligence